In Charles Humming's excellent, intelligent and highly recommended new spy novel The Trinity Six, I encounter an unfamiliar quotation from Dostoyevsky, whom, we must all recognise, new a thing or two and more than most about the dark and complex workings of the human heart.
Try this on for size, and see if it doesn't speak to everyone who's got in a mess with food, drink, weight, and is now struggling with weightloss which they want to make stick:
'If you want to be respected by others, the great thing is to respect yourself. Only by self-respect will you compel others to respect you.'
I know that old Pops Staples said something similar (and none the worse for that), but I was really struck by the power of that verb; 'compel'.
We who have been held in thrall by the destructive power of our compulsions, must learn to harness that power positively to build our self-esteem and compel others to recognise what us unique and wonderful about each and every one of us, instead of carelessly, pointlessly frittering away our energy in a life-long orgy of self-destruction and delusion.
Viewed from this angle, it us clear that this thing isn't just about cutting out French fries or saying no to cake. That's looking at and treating the symptoms, whereas the causes lie elsewhere, and therein lurks the challenge.
Quite simply; if we don't engage with the underlying issues, then ultimately we will fail, and not just in respect of weightloss, but as human beings, since until that coffin lid is nailed down tight, we will never succeed in sloughing off the pupa skin of a self-obsessed and damaged childhood and emerge as mature functioning adults.
I'm willing to give it a go. How about you?
Yes Freddy, this is where I know I need to work now, as the fat retreats the moraines are left to be dealt with.
ReplyDeleteI said, ooh Mama, we're all crazee now!
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